No Valentines
The National Hockey League season started a week ago Tuesday and that means—more weird advertisements on the rinks’ boards. Wednesday saw what just might be the highlight of the season: in Calgary, Alberta, a law firm claimed to be “Lawyers You’ll Love.” An outpouring of valentines is—to my mind at least—quite unlikely.
Panic Stations
Sportsnet.ca had the following headline on Thursday, Oct. 12:
The Edmonton Oilers lost their opening game of the season—and had only 81 more to play. Keep away from open windows, folks!
But lest you think that winning their opening game brings blue skies, bright sunshine, and flowers, here’s another headline at Sportsnet:
The 'what-ifs' for the Toronto Maple Leafs after one single game
What The New Yorker used to call “The Omnipotent Whom”
In related news: The elite law firm Davis Polk rescinded job offers for students whom it believed led organizations that signed statements blaming Israel for the Hamas attacks — but said it was reconsidering some of those decisions.
(NY Times newsletter)
Like the Dodo
Remember Pontiac motor cars? In their later days they advertised their vehicles thusly:
We Build Excitement
Maybe if they concentrated on building cars, they might still be in business.
How Many Fingers?
In last night’s Los Angeles Kings hockey game, one of the advertisements on the sideboards read:
LA Restaurant Week
Oct. 6-20
Best Advice?
One of the features of modern food packaging is a picture of the product with the caption “Serving Suggestion.” That makes perfect sense if you are depicting your crackers with a lump of beluga on it. Be aware, patron, there’s only a bunch of wafers in the tube.
But somehow I have to think that the “serving suggestion” on the following panel on a package of tea bags is the most helpful advice of all:
After all, what use is hot tea without a cup?
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