Friday, March 4, 2016

On the Campaign Trail

Reporter:

Mr.Trump, you have been praised by many extreme elements, including members of the KKK. What do you say to that?

Trump:

I love the KKK; they make the greatest fried chicken—and the biscuits!, they're to die for!

Campaign Aide (sotto voce):

That's not the KKK, Mr. Trump. That's KFC.

Trump (sotto voce):

No, really? (Aloud): I mean I love all those bro fraternities with their three letters and their panty raids and their (laughing) fun hazing. In fact, I have a Phi Beta Kappa ring myself; I picked it up at an Atlantic City pawn shop. Shows that I'm not the only American who went bankrupt.

Reporter:

The KKK is not a group of college students. The KKK is an historically vicious and violent organization that is anti-semitic and anti-black people. They committed lynchings and burned crosses.

Trump:

Burned crosses?

Reporter:

Yes, burned crosses and bombed black churches.

Trump:

I am a Christian; I make sure all my wives are Christian. Can't have people burning crosses.

Reporter:

Then you disavow their support?

Trump:

Yeah. OK. I disavow—if you want me to. BUT I DISAVOW MEXICANS AND MUSLIMS MORE!